April 26th, 2018

Tagorian Flugelhorn

There are several instruments in the universe that are both well known and beloved.

The Dewworn Double Bass, for example, is instantly recognizable as the instrument that provides the driving groove line in the classic CozmoNaught single “Blackhole Beauty and a Gravity Well”, a tune that has proven to be a better ice breaker than any plasma-hammer could ever hope to be.  For the more sophisticated listener, the Wenglegurg Dulcimer exists.  With its 1632 strings, it is capable of producing chords of such complexity that it has been classified as a munition by the Melodic Warfare division of the Wenglegurgian Marine Corps.

But nothing can surpass the utterly unsurpassable beauty emitted from the bell of a Tagorian Flugelhorn.  This is of course surpassed by the complexity of the instrument itself.  Its construction requires materials nearly impossible to find in our current age.  Mefin ArgoSteele, Pearlescent Qixd Ivory, Urnuvooian Valve Oil, and the bladder of a still-living Ioniconic Sheeprat, make this an exotic and difficult to produce instrument.   There are six known to be left in the Galaxy and at the last auction held by Christie’s of Alpha Centauri, the weight the of ink needed to write all the zero’s on the check for the winning bid caused the auction house to sink 28 meters into the ground (few survived).

Surpassing the difficulty of construction is the skill required to actually play the Tagorian Flugelhorn.  It is so difficult that Tagorians themselves do not have the lifespan required to learn how to play it.  There is only one race in the galaxy, whom pass their accumulated knowledge genetically onto their offspring and have a similar combination of a multi-lipped mouth structure and gilled neck, that are able to achieve the physical and psychological contortions as well as the requisite four lifetime’s worth of muscle memory required to produce sound from the horn.  While an accomplished player can create music said to have caused the Rapture on 3 worlds, an inexperienced player can wreak havoc to its surroundings.  It is for that reason that junior recitals have been limited to every 520 years, and only then held on planets that are already well on their way to total environmental collapse.   The Volcanic Symphony was not named for its symbolism alone.

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